***

PROVERBS 20+NINE

:v.13 THE POOR MAN AND THE OPPRESSOR MEET TOGETHER; THE LORD GIVES LIGHT TO THE EYES OF BOTH.

i didn’t / possibly still don’t fully get this verse. i’m a little stuck on what it means for the Lord to “give light to the eyes”. i read a few commentaries, which just reiterated the parts i didn’t get, just in a different wording. Then i stumbled across John Gill’s thoughts about it, wherein he mentioned Matthew 5:45 …FOR HE MAKES HIS SUN RISE ON THE EVIL AND ON THE GOOD, AND SENDS RAIN ON THE JUST AND ON THE UNJUST. He also referred to the light as being the “light of grace”. Maybe it means God’s grace transcends our labels/ideas of who is and isn’t worthy of such a sweet gift.

PROVERBS THIRTY

:v.1 THE WORDS OF AGUR SON OF JAKEH. THE ORACLE. THE MAN DECLARES, I AM WEARY, O GOD; I AM WEARY, O GOD, AND WORN OUT.

i love this chapter; its entirety is fascinating. It might be my favorite. Trying to pick one verse is ridiculous. i read it yesterday, and yesterday’s thoughts are different from todays. Yesterday i would have chosen 4, but today i choose 1. A conversation has left me feeling confronted & overwhelmed & frustrated by scripture… like there are vital things i need to see clearly before taking any steps over invisible bridges. i wonder if it would be “easier” to wrestle with an Angel rather than words on a page.

PROVERBS 30+ONE

:v.9-10 OPEN YOUR MOUTH, JUDGE RIGHTEOUSLY, DEFEND THE RIGHTS OF THE POOR AND NEEDY. THE WOMAN WHO FEARS THE LORD AN EXCELLENT WIFE WHO CAN FIND? SHE IS FAR MORE PRECIOUS THAN JEWELS.

v.9 ends with “The Woman Who Fears the LORD”, in the middle of the sentence with no segue that makes sense to me. It’s as though King Lemuel is pondering about the people in his Kingdom and is suddenly distracted. Also, i’m always curious how human beings are capable of pure righteous judgment. Prophets perhaps… and I suppose if God appoints someone, anything is possible. Aside from all this, i crave to be this woman and am constantly wondering what it fully means to fear the LORD.

Advertisements

PROVERBS 20+EIGHT

:v.26 WHOEVER TRUSTS IN HIS OWN MIND IS A FOOL, BUT HE WHO WALKS IN WISDOM WILL BE DELIVERED.

i used to have this [awesome] friend who would tell me all about the mind-trips that he had… meaning things he would be thinking and convincing himself of as being true; things that would ultimately manifest into his reality, even though they really only existed in his mind. Not psychotic breaks or anything nearly as drastic here, but perhaps a lesser deviant that could turn worse if left unchecked? For example, it could be something as seemingly harmless as imagining how a conversation would play out, before it happened. Or perhaps speculating on the intentionality behind someone elses (re)actions or lack thereof. The manifestation into reality of all this behind the scenes interplay (in one’s own mind) = all sorts of havoc — anxiety, disconnection, isolation, distrust, hurt feelings, etc…. as it should though, right? In a way it’s playing god.

& So i’ve totally done this. Ruined days by doing so. What does it mean to walk in Wisdom? Assuming the best in others? Not assuming at all? Is that even possible fully? Maybe it has more to do with deliverance. Maybe it’s acknowledging that human beings are fatally communication challenged. Maybe wisdom is not remaining stuck in our own minds plausibility, by allowing correction in, past the pride of thinking i’ve got you and you and you all figured out

honey

PROVERBS 20+SIX

:v.11 LIKE A DOG THAT RETURNS TO HIS VOMIT IS A FOOL WHO REPEATS HIS FOLLY.

It’s just the most graphic sentence in this whole chapter. i feel it in the pit of my stomach and the back of my throat when i read it. It’s like the word “chunks”; i just can’t handle it… even typing it makes me feel sick. With the other verses, i pity the fool, but with this one, i’m just repulsed.

PROVERBS 20+SEVEN

:v.7 ONE WHO IS FULL LOATHES HONEY, BUT TO ONE WHO IS HUNGRY EVERYTHING BITTER IS SWEET. :v.9 OIL AND PERFUME MAKE THE HEART GLAD, AND THE SWEETNESS OF A FRIEND COMES FROM HIS EARNEST COUNSEL.

Clarity of mind in the midst of supposed desire is not easy. i will willingly blind myself to big-deal things and not realize how far i’ve overstepped, until i’m officially on the other side of indulgence. It’s not always, and i’d like to think i’m not so easy to fall for it as what i have been in the past; i’d like to think i’m wiser and stronger, but it truly is only by the grace of God that i’m not the fool. Within the past month or so, i’ve been in awe of and incredibly grateful for godly friends — the kind that will see honey, know it’s sweet, yet still remind/counsel me to always question what it is i’m really hungry for; what it is i’ll truly be satisfied by. i am more cautious, blessed, and covered than i ever have been.

PROVERBS 20+FIVE:

v.2-3 IT IS THE GLORY OF GOD TO CONCEAL THINGS, BUT THE GLORY OF KINGS IS TO SEARCH THINGS OUT. AS THE HEAVENS FOR HEIGHT, AND THE EARTH FOR DEPTH, SO THE HEART OF KINGS IS UNSEARCHABLE.

i’ve been fascinated with and am still trying to figure out who represents the “Kings” throughout Proverbs. There’s also something really intriguing about how the concealment of things glorifies both God and Kings… haven’t figured out fully why yet, but there’s something sweet there, as though the act of concealment is somehow connected to how God has made us (with it being, inherently vital) and also a gift to us at the same time (that we would have purpose to seek out what has been concealed).

So we’ve gone through the entirity of it, but our group is continuing on this PROVERBS kick of one chapter a day. i’m bored with logging it the way i have been, so here’s something different. i’ll try my hardest to only pick one (or two) verse(s) and then add thoughts to it.

PROVERBS 20+FOUR

:v.14 KNOW THAT WISDOM IS SUCH TO YOUR SOUL; IF YOU FIND IT, THERE WILL BE A FUTURE, AND YOUR HOPE WILL NOT BE CUT OFF.

i think i like If/Then sort of statements. Even though there is no “then”, it’s pretty much implied, as far as i’m concerned. Which makes me wonder, why do i crave formulas? If someone were to ask me if i liked formulaic things, i would adamantly protest against them. Maybe it just means, that as much as i rebel against it, something deep inside of me craves order. To know that a question has a definitive answer is some sort of salve to the mathematical soul… God created us with such beautifully intense precision, i suppose it makes sense.

All that aside, to have wisdom is to have hope and hope looks ahead to the future, not stuck in the past. If i look behind me, it’s easy to get stuck in thinking there’s no hope for any good to result out of the trail i’ve blazed so far, and yet God surprises us (me) with grace and making all things new. remarkable. (ps this is so in line with the lyrics in Beyond the Blue)

SIXTEEN-NINETEEN

…back to the beginning

[SIXTEEN] All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the LORD weighs the spirit. Commit your work to the LORD, and your plans will be established. The LORD has made everything for its purpose, even the wicked for the day of trouble. [v.2-4]

The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps. [v.9]

[SEVENTEEN] & [EIGHTEEN] m.i.a. (i was)

[NINETEEN] Desire without knowledge is not good, and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way. [v2]

FIFTEEN

AM & PM

The eyes of the LORD are in every place, keeping watch on the evil and the good. [v.3]

Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a fattened ox and hatred with it. [v.17]

The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things. [v.28]

FOURTEEN

Yesterday…

AM & PM

There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death. Even in laughter the heart may ache, and the end of joy may be grief. [v.12&13]

In the fear of the LORD one has strong confidence, and his children will have refuge. [v.26]

A tranquil heart gives life to the flesh, but envy makes the bones rot. [v.30]

Wisdom rests in the heart of a man of understanding but it makes itself known even in the midst of fools. [v.33]

THIRTEEN

AM&PM

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life. [v.12]

In everything the prudent acts with knowledge, but a fool flaunts his folly. [v.16]

TEN-TWELVE

i read… sometimes in both the am&pm, sometimes only once…

TEN: The wise of heart will receive commandments, but a babbling fool will come to ruin. [v.8] Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses. [v.12] Whoever heeds instruction is on the path to life, but he who rejects reproof leads others astray. [v.17] When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent. [v.19]

ELEVEN: Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman without discretion. [v.22] Whoever troubles his own household will inherit the wind, and the fool will be servant to the wise of heart. [v.29]

TWELVE: Whoever is righteous has regard for the life of his beast, but the mercy of the wicked is cruel. [v.10] From the fruit of his mouth a man is satisfied with good, and the work of a man’s hand comes back to him. [v.14] Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment. [v.19] Anxiety in a man’s hear weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad. [v.25]